Mysterious DC food blog comment about Comet Ping Pong in 2009: "One things certain: Comet is *really* far from where most of Washingtonians readers live." ( pizzagate )

submitted by Psalm100

"One thing’s certain: Comet is really far from where most of Washingtonian‘s readers live." - Kriston Capps, Online Food Association blog.

https://internetfoodassociation.wordpress.com/2009/08/14/fair-and-balanced-breakfast-august-14-2009/

That's a comment that appeared on a DC-based food blog in 2009.

The Washingtonian is obviously a magazine about DC. Its motto is "The Magazine Washington Lives By." Comet Ping Pong is in DC. So why would would anyone running a food blog based in DC say "One thing’s certain" about Comet - it's " really far from where most of Washingtonian‘s readers live." The comment is a play on the magazine's motto, but it also may say something about Comet Pizza. Apparently, it's for "certain" that it's not something for "most people."

Kriston Capps of "The Online Food Association" blog was discussing a contest that the Washingtonian held in 2009. Readers voted on the best pizza places in DC. 32 places competed, and readers got to choose between two places at a time in a playoff with brackets, until one place would eventually be declared the winner.

The OFA blog apparently made the remark about Comet after it lost its contest to a restaurant called Piola. OFA linked to an image showing a "pizza pool chart," but that image no longer exists. And The Washingtonian's main page for the pizza contest no longer exists either.

http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/6007/pizzapoolchart2.jpg

https://www.washingtonian.com/blogarticles/restaurants/bestbites/13172.html

On the Washingtonian's broken link page, there is a message that says, "Page Does Not Exist, But Here Are 404 Pandas For Your Enjoyment," and the image of 404 tiny pandas. Pandas showed up in at least a couple of the jimmycomet Instagram photos.

You have to wonder why the OFA blog would single out Comet Pizza for that remark. The image the remark linked to is gone, so one can only speculate. But one possibility is that Comet has a reputation for being seedy, at the least. A look at the acts that have performed there and the wall art would suggest that, as would the public jimmycomet posts.

And a note on the "Online Food Association" blog, too. While it sounds like an industry group, it's actually made up of prominent, high-powered young professionals. Kriston Capps is a contributor to The Atlantic, and Ezra Klein (of Vox and "journolist") and Matthew Yglesias (who worked for Podesta's Center for American Progress) also blog on OFA.

I came across the blog and the pizza contest after finding an entry by Yglesias that links to a story that discusses how John Podesta had a job that involved slaughtering pigs to earn money while in law school.

https://internetfoodassociation.wordpress.com/2009/07/10/killer-of-pigs/ http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0709/24575_Page3.html

There's a thread about Podesta butchering pigs here:

https://voat.co/v/pizzagate/1443931

Yglesias writes about the Washintonian's pizza contest:

"Washingtonian magazine is currently running a DC pizza bracket of some kind that foolishly lets the audience vote on which pizzas are best. Pizza, however, is best understood as a draconian autocracy in which the masses should be told which pizzas are best. That said, contemplating the question simply brings home the fact that in my almost six years of living here, Washington has been transformed from a deplorable pizza town into actually quite a good pizza town."

Yglesias also lists places which he says have good pizza, and Comet is one of them. So is that possibly why Capps says Comet is " really far from where most of Washingtonian‘s readers live" - because most Washingtonians can't judge really good pizza? It's hard to say without seeing the image Capps linked to that no longer exists. But it doesn't sound like it. Capps didn't add that he thought Comet had terrific pizza. It seems more likely he was referring to something else about Comet that makes it " really far from where most of Washingtonian‘s readers live."

And on pandas and pedophilia, here's something:

"Pedobear is an Internet meme that became popular through the imageboard 4chan.[1] As the name suggests ("pedo" being short for "pedophile"), it is portrayed as a pedophilic bear.[2] It is a concept used to mock pedophiles or people who have any sexual interest in children or jailbait.[3][4][5] The bear image has been likened to bait used to lure children or as a mascot for pedophiles.[3][5]"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pedobear

The bear pictured is a brown bear, but it seems possible that panda bears could be a variation on the idea.

Psalm100

But something about Comet Ping Pong is that it always seems to be trying to bring children and sexual material close together, and people involved with it like the owner laugh about that, as in the instagram picture where a sexual joke is made about the place and someone mentions "no more children" will be allowed. And the concept of Comet Pizza seems to be to have a place where both children and sexual perversion can exist under one roof. The Panda Head "all ages" event held there was undoubtedly no innocent event, yet the artwork for it is done in the style of children's drawings.

Psalm100

That could very well be one reason why pandas show up in the jimmycomet instagram photos and why there's a Panda Head magazine associated with Comet Ping Pong. Looking at the urban slang dictionary, though, there seems to me a dozen or more additional possibilities as well. Still, what you mention seems most likely given everything.

comeonpeople

I don't understand why you think it means anything other than the literal, that the Washingtonian readership doesn't live geographically near Comet. Why on earth would you assume "he was referring to something else about Comet" that means "it's not something for "most people""? That's a big, and unnecessary, leap.

we have to think that many people wouldn't go there and especially wouldn't take their children there, any time of day.

But you'd be wrong, it's very popular, including among parents.

Pandas are a big deal in DC because of the National Zoo and the pandas on loan from China. Whenever there is a pregnancy or baby the whole city goes nuts and it's on the news all the time.

Psalm100

Well, it's actually clear that the literal meaning about distance can't be the entire point.

The DC suburbs aren't " really far from where most of Washingtonian‘s readers live." (Italics in the original).

As someone else mentioned, it has to also mean something like the suburbanite readers of the Washingtonian being "uncool" versus the "cool" Comet Ping Pong, and that puts a distance between them, which is a much greater distance than the physical one, which isn't that much at all. We're not comparing the DC suburbs to a place across the country or across the world.

I'm also sure that the place is popular, but that still doesn't mean that many people don't refuse to go there or take their children there. The more you look at it, the more you see CPP cultivates serious weirdness, and that weirdness is largely of a sexual sort. Ultra liberals - the Hollywood artistic and intellectual types - are likely to go there and take their children there. And then there are the ping pong tables that might attract some families who go there with some reservations. But many other people are going to stay away like many people always thought there was something off about Michael Jackson.

Pandas figure in two jimmycomet instagram photos, and one is very sexual. "Panda Head" magazine also has had events at CPP, including one "all ages." But PH magazine is also pretty weird.

comeonpeople

The majority of the readers live in Virginia, not DC: http://pdf.washingtonian.com/pdf/1_p_quick_guide.pdf

It's truly bizarre to see this stretching to assume he meant metaphorical distance. It's a throwaway line in a blog list, not a piece in a lit mag.

that still doesn't mean that many people don't refuse to go there or take their children there.

If you say so. Who needs evidence? Just say it and people will believe it.

Psalm100

It's truly bizarre to see this stretching to assume he meant metaphorical distance. It's a throwaway line in a blog list, not a piece in a lit mag.>

That line, though, was in reference to Comet Pizza losing out to Piola Pizza in their popularity contest match-up, and Piola is also in DC and so not where most of Washingtonian's readers live, either.

Piola is closer to Virginia than Comet, but Comet is less than a mile from Maryland, where according to your link 40% of Washingtonian's readers live.

In either case, though, we're only talking about two or three miles .

Neither restaurant is that far from either the Virginia or Maryland border on foot, much less by car. And presumably many of Washingtonian's suburban readers work in DC and in the course of the day might be in the neighborhood of either or both pizza places.

Comet being " really far from where most of Washingtonians readers live" just isn't true in a physical sense. And in a physical sense, it is really no further than Piola is.

Edit: And keep in mind, too, that the comment is playing off of Washingtonian's motto: "The Magazine Washington Lives By." Lifestyle is meant by Washingtonian, not distance. The blogger seems to be referencing the irony of most of the magazine's readers not living in DC proper AND Comet being not part of most of Washingtonian's readers lifestyle at the same time.

Psalm100

There is a magazine in DC called Panda Head. It held an event at Comet Ping Pong:

https://www.facebook.com/pandaheadmorgan/photos/a.437473367786.230678.80574782786/377869277786/?type=1&theater

It's current profile picture is just one of those Illuminati-type eyes.

pizzathrowaway

I think the writer was making fun of Washingtonian, which is not a very cool magazine. It's mostly read by suburbanites.

Psalm100

I do see how that could be what the writer meant. And perhaps if he did that's the only thing he meant, but on the other hand, he could also mean both - that the Washingtonian's readers are mostly suburbanites and that CPP is not for them. From the looks of it, including just the public things like the wall art in the place, and the acts that have played there, we have to think that many people wouldn't go there and especially wouldn't take their children there, any time of day. It's like Tony Podesta's art, as the Washington Post described it - their set think it's great, but many people find it disturbing. You see those images in there on the walls, and how many Americans would stay with their families and/or take them back there?

pizzathrowaway

Well, the wall art wasn't even there when this was posted (2009) and isn't there any more. And the bands don't play until the late evening. But it's true that the clientele is maybe distinct from the Washingtonian audience in a number of ways.

Psalm100

That's useful to know. But still from how it's said it sounds like Comet is really out of the mainstream for some reason.

pizzathrowaway

the panda bears are just because everyone in DC is obsessed with the adorable panda bears at the National Zoo.

existentialenso

Yeah, the same thing is true down here in Atlanta with the pandas. Some people are just REALLY into pandas. And I get it, they're cute.

Psalm100

But they showed up in some of the jimmycomet instagram photos which had sexual comments to go along with them. There's their colors too, which have been associated with pizzagate as well. The handkerchief J Podesta left was white with black.

heygeorge

Pedobear was made up not by kiddie touchers but by internet edgelords. So not really much of a connection there if you ask me.

Psalm100

I read that. But since it's something that identifies pedophiles you have to think many would embrace it. If they're identifying as pedophiles, accepting a bear image isn't going to faze them and might actually be a positive to them. The bear doesn't seem scary, and it certainly doesn't look like a monster.

heygeorge

I was actually around for that time (didn't have to read about it) and the only game involving pedobear was getting him placed in completely inappropriate contexts for the lulz. Combine that with the leap to pandas and the idea really doesn't hold water. Not trying to CTR you, just sayin'.

Stay vigilant!