I'm writing in a already closed area, but think it will get to you. Try the writing technique described in PTSD by Cathy O'brien available on Amazon. Write your memories out, with how you got into it and how you got out in the story. Writing changes the memories into a narrative form, a story that will settle back in your brain in that way, instead of hitting you like an emotion laden kaleidoscope. Don't get it right, just get it written! Then you can speak of it to others in a less emotional way. It won't re traumatize you or them in the telling. It's very freeing and free also. Please try it. I've been where your at, it gets better. Chow.

why was this thread removed?

I will be sharing your story with all who will listen and I will pray for you. May I suggest that, if you can tolerate it, a reputable Brazilian Jiujitsu school could turn that anger into a useful tool. Will also give you the confidence to look people in the eye as you will be so completely confident in your ability to handle attackers much bigger than you.

Yes, it's all about you.

@Imnukkinfuts79 , I'm sorry but I need to remove your submission per rule 2: posts without sources are not accepted to this subverse. I know this is not necessarily easy in your case, but if you could source your story or verify yourself in any way, it would be much appreciated and we could allow you to resubmit this to this subverse. Otherwise, please resubmit to /v/pizzagatewhatever , a subverse with much less strict submission rules. Thank you.

I'm also flairing this as Unverified per the above.

Thank you for your story. I think you are an important witness. Everything you wrote is significant, but the fact you met Johny Gosch is mindblowing to me and presumably many others.

I know it is painful, but when you have time, could you draw or paint your memories of the SRA and the other abuse you described? Somehow visual evidence cuts straight through to many people in a way mere words can't. Drawings and paintings of remembered abuse help the pizzagate/pedogate message spread to the wider public.

Please look after yourself and stay safe. Also I wonder too if you still play music.

Thank you for writing, and sharing. I feel for you, I can't tell how much. As a survivor, what can we, the good people of now, the good people of this world who want this to STOP, do to help ? We want to, we need to . What can we do best?

i have never hid behind a proxy

please find me

approach me

god has blessed me

i send my blessings and energy

pray with me

Some formatting would be nice.

I believe I may have met you on FB, if not I referred someone with close to your story, to come tell her story here because I believe we all can learn from victims like yourself. I pray that you have found some peace, and never let this define the person you are! Just stay strong and keep telling your story! There are plenty of us that believe you and stand behind you and all the others that don't have a voice!

I am so sorry for what you've been through, and I thank you for sharing your story with us. Every time I read one of these SRA survivor stories (e.g. Fiona Barnett), I simply cannot help bursting into tears. I cannot even imagine what you must feel having actually gone through it. I'm not even sure what more I could say that would be helpful, just please remember that there are good people within this community who are continuing to investigate and raise awareness in whatever way possible. While the overwhelming majority of responses to this post have been quite supportive, please don't let the naysayers/non-believers get you down. I'm sure many people over the years have tried to "change your memories" by telling you that certain things didn't happen, for example, it's your "imagination", it was "just a dream", etc - just keep in mind that YOU know the truth, and there are those who genuinely care and want to help.

Nice words and truth.

The STFU & accusations have been horrible to watch and experience.

Still your scriptures help and have not known about them that long.

PS Angel, help us get the people we need to, those who you know. Send any of us a message. We're with you.

Read your story and cried for a long time. For you and for so many who you represent. For victims of these unspeakable acts that need your honest words. No greater power than living witness and you are. Courageous and not broken in everyone's eyes. Understood and am sure touched many hearts.

Wish you could know someday that there are good guys inside as well. Ones that have stood against abuse of power. Hope you meet heros someday that can restore this truth.

You have spoken for so many.

I just teeeted the news link to the story of dead D.C. cop they pulled from the water. His court documents were found in a rental car near the water??

What do you mean?

Thanks for sharing your story.

As more and more witnesses and victims of this SRA come forward they are finding ways to move to healing. In a sense, it may be somewhat like what you are saying, that you will heal yourself but as each one progresses it may help the others. I think it's important for all to know that vast numbers of us are listening and trust that we will move officials to stop this insanity. Children don't have a chance against these forces which count on the fact that children can't defend themselves. And they count on the fact that children find it impossible to even describe what has happened to them at such young ages. And when they are caught they can also count on higher up's protecting them. They are immense cowards preying on kids.

It seems that so many therapists have now seen so many patients dealing with SRA that it has had to be accepted as reality. That it is so way beyond what we have ever even thought we understood about pedophilia that it moves this abuse to a different plane. Children must now be believed when they tell these stories.

Thank you for letting us know what has happened to you and the reality of what has been going on.

You are not worthless. I love you. I pray that you may find some peace and justice in this life.

You sound just like me. I've always prayed to God not to let me remember, but i've asked for hints so i can know for sure (what my therapist insisted had happened to me, based on behavioral symptoms and interviews she did with my family) as well as what age the incest started. I was shown exactly when it started through a dream - i saw myself in a bassinet, with diapers thrown aside and my bottom all red. The day after that dream, I asked my mom if there was anything strange she could tell me about my being 6 months old, anything to do with my father? And she literally right off the bat described coming home and seeing the scene i just described from my dream. A few years ago i did some acid and that block between my past and now just disappeared, and memories started whizzing by me, through me, at a dizzying, completely uncontrolled pace. Some were happy, not many, most were of me just being in a world of grey depression wishing for death and acting out. But some were of what i can still only describe as the grossest thing ever, something i can't bring myself to say. I don't know how people deal with this if it's impossible to talk about, to acknowledge even to ourselves. But one thing i do believe is that God can heal all of this, it will just take time. I was inspired to write because you mentioned the cloud of hatred and fear that never made sense. I'm kind of experiencing that now. Pizzagate is cathartic, but it does bring up a lot of rage.

You were dealt a very bad hand. Any of us could have been in your shoes had we been born into a den of lunatics. It's pure chance, not predestination. You did not deserve this, you should always know that. You deserve to be loved and you deserve to love yourself. If I were you I'd get a new identity so I didn't have to a live like a nomad. Thank you for telling your story. It doesn't own you, don't forget that.

I am sorry to hear about what you went through. Do you feel it had anything to do with Freemasonry/Illuminati? Also, do you feel the the people involved were Luciferian in that they worship Lucifer? I ask because people always mention Satan, but I believe it is Lucifer instead.

God bless you. Thank you so much for the effort it took to write this. I am so glad you are experiencing some healing as a result of pizzagate. You are not alone in that. May this healing be only the very beginning of something big. The meek shall inherit the earth.

Sorry to hear this happened to you. I am proud of your bravery to share your story. You have people that support you, there are bad people... but the good far outnumber the bad.

Becki is an amazing young thing and maybe the OP would like to hook up with her? She's a legend and incredible role model of the positivity that can come out of the darkeness into the light : )

this seems so fake tbh. this is glp level role playing.

Hang in there...

Thank you for sharing. It's so important for victims to know they have a safe place here to share so that they can educate more people and also for them to have the opportunity to talk about their experiences to aid in the life long healing process. I wish we could all go rip your abusers out of their lives and expose them to what they deserve.

There's no statute of limitations on murder, regarding the dead girl you saw. There shouldn't be one on torture either. Pizzagaters, that's something we should do, change the law for victims of torture.

It made me sick and sad when I read your story. Your story is what I think of when you hear of all these children being with abusers and Satanists. The children that feel hopeless and in despair. Not knowing any other normal. Then there are kids like you that you can abuse them relentlessly, but never break their spirit or their desire to continue to live. I hope you continue to use this strength to put down all these bastards by helping other children make it out of this hell. Stay tough and strong.

Thanks for sharing, and don't let the CTR shills on Voat bully you. Fuck them.

Gentle hugs to you, and thank you for sharing your story with us. We know who we're fighting for but it's so important for the victims to have a safe place to get support. When the truth comes out, there will be many more victims coming forward and you will be needed more than ever-- for guidance, insight, and inspiration to them as well as to those who at this moment have no idea about any of this.

Friends, please hear me. That we are investigating all of this, and understand what a victim of RSA must go though, when a person who's experienced it rocks up and tells us what it's actually like , please, please let us be easy on them.

That people question their authenticity when it's possibly the first time they've expressed what happened to them, isn't maybe the best approach.

Please, please let this place be a place of peace and understanding, and a place all people who have had experiences like this, feel safe.

It makes us all stronger. Together.

Thank you for sharing. If you can find meaning in all of your suffering that may be the best way to redeem the wrong. This community and the overall awareness being raised may be an outlet for you to create more and more meaning from such evil imposed on you. As a community, we stand against your abusers and the evil that they subscribe to. You are a valuable human being.

I wish it was rpg. This is my life. I have nothing but my experiences. I told a whopper once. It has shamed me for life, now I speak only the truth , if I can't tell the truth than I keep my silence but I refuse to have a liars tounge. But I get it .. I do. Even repeating my story I am able to disassociate from it, a knack of a survival skill. It almost seems like I'm talking about someone else at times.

The grit required to survive thru all that is amazing. I'm sure there is pain that I'll never understand, but know this: I'm glad that you're still here. And I look up to you for having the grit to keep going.

You are not alone. Many go thru such trauma. It has been happening since the beginning, generation after generation. As long as bad people can hide the bad things that they do, it will continue. The only way that it stops is by shining a light on it, by exposing it. By telling us your story, you have shone light on it. This could be the last generation that goes thru what you went thru - because you and people like you speak up. I look forward to the day when bad people are exposed for what they are, and the next generation of children can live the life as they should.

Thank you. I'm just some nobody on the internet, but you have my utmost respect. I'm sure it wasn't easy to write that, but the more people know, the better chance of all this hitting the critical mass necessary to keep rolling on it's own.

Keep going. Survive. Keep working thru it. Thrive.

What a brave soul and fighter you are. To come here and share your story, is so, incredibly brave of you. Thank you for sharing it with us, as difficult as it must be. I wish you strength and peace and the life back which was taken from you. YOU are helping millions of others by sharing your experiences. Keep on fighting girl, we're all right, RIGHT behind you.

Thank you. I believe in god, but not religion. Institutionalized religion is a tool of the masses, I was raised Catholic so.. There's that..

Thank you for sharing your story. You are a role model and a hero to this cause I want you to know that. You have helped so many people by telling this. Myself included, No child deserves what was done to you. And there are so many nameless victims out there, I stay up at night worrying about them. I can't believe you you made it out. Thank god really! You are clearly a very strong and special person. Be careful and stay vigilant , you have been able to stay one step ahead of these evil people. Don't give up, I believe your story.many will believe you here. I myself will keep you in my prayers, and I will not forget. thank you so much for sharing this, ! Wow it's baffling and a miracle....the darkness could not win. I pray you see justice served one day, in the meanwhile please be good to yourself and know we here are so grateful you survived. We care and we cry for the children everyday, none of them deserve it. Thank you again.

I am very sorry you were robbed of your childhood and in turn the horrific things you had to endure. Thank you for sharing your story. I hope more people feel comfortable coming forward, and are able to find solace with others who have survived, and too from those like us who are here to help however we can. May you find peace in your heart.

only problem is that I don't think this is related to pg... try to post it on /pizzagateuncensored/ or somewhere else

You're a fighter. Keep fighting no matter what, as this movement is showing you, the light exists, and it is powerful, stay with the light as it will stay with you.

Also, are you saying that Johnny Gosch was your handler? I'm curious what part of Iowa this occurred in and if you can confirm that.

My story is similar to yours. I started remembering at about 34 years of age. The memories started coming to me as if they were a dream, or quick flashbacks that made me shake my head and wonder what the hell was that all about. Then they started coming faster and I basically had a major meltdown. I believe I was programmed to act in a very self destructive manner if I started remembering, because I put myself in many very dangerous situations. Ugh.. can't get too deep into it, but yes, I understand what you are describing.

How could you have been born out of incest during a ritual, but your mother not know your father was involving you in the occult? And why wouldn't she believe you if similar things happened to her?

I honestly can not read all of this. I am also a victim... so it's an honest trigger for me.... but I support you. I never came clean with these accusations... because I simply don't remember the full details....

look at that username

Very sorry you had to go through this, and so many others. Hope you find a good therapist. People are awake to these motherfuckers, and they are pissed off, and we are growing by the day. It's only been 4-5 months since pizzagate broke open, in a year I can only imagine the outrage. Hopefully this can bring down the entire 3000 year old Satanic Illuminati quest for a New World Order, hopefully Jesus will help us out.

Thank you for telling your story

Since you lived in iowa... not sure if you have heard of With One Accord Ministries? Bill Schoebelen? He does ministry with people who have been involved in satanic ritual abuse. Said in one video that he gets about 50 calls a week.

His books are amazing.

To find him on youtube, search prophecy club - bill schoebelen (if I am spelling his name right).

His lectures are a time commitment but he outlines his experience in satanist, explains the hierarchy and his website has specific prayers.

Healing can happen - sometimes in fits and starts and sometimes all at once. Just depends.

Thank you!!