Saturday afternoon and a time for reflection. This story is true and it happened on my farm that I had owned in rural Ontario. It was outside a town called Orangeville and close to a very small town called Grand Valley. The farm was built in 1850 and aside from the two barns and two ponds it now had two dogs that roamed around and two small children.
I don't remember if it was early Spring or Autumn but it was that type of cold morning with a film of fog and windows slightly steamed up. I was at the kitchen sink. A window was in front of me that looked out onto the property. There was a small yard and then an arena that was used, back in the day, to corral horses and such. It had wooden fences that wrapped around it. The small yard was close to the farm house and my children often played out there with their toy dump trucks and cars My daughter, who was still very young, would clutch her power ranger, not all that interested in the 'boys and their toys' routine.She would giggle and play with my dogs, Boo and Frank. they were large dogs and extremely gentle. Boo would lick her face and she would squeal with excitement.
On this morning I think I had, as I would often do, sleep late. When one works as an actor on film sets the down time is usually spent(for me anyway back then) as a time to regenerate and shed whatever character you had just played in a film. I often played bad guys and yeah, it is not something you want creeping into your real life. Perhaps i suffered from an unhealthy ego but i thought of it much like a boxer recuperating from a fight. In any case, it was late morning and I had wandered down to the kitchen and made myself a coffee. Looking out that window I saw my two beautiful munchkins.They looked like such farm kids, in their overalls and boots, hair tousled and unkept. Morgan often wore the cowboy hat i had got him and he loved his authentic vintage cowboy boots. Lily was young, maybe around 2 and half at the time if memory serves me. She adored her big brother and between him and the dogs, wow, she was in heaven on this farm.I had even dug a river for them and had put in a tea house, Lily's tea-house, with tiny delicate plastic cups and saucers that sat on a tiny table. But I am getting ahead of myself and the tea house was usually on days like that, an afternoon excursion where I would pull them both seated in the red wagon, the dogs, galloping beside us, as we headed down through the long grass behind the big barn and to that little creek where they was a candy striped bridge you had to cross to get to Lily's tea-house. Idealistic is an understatement. A kind of Utopia I had created for them based on my love for old films like to Kill A Mockingbird.
BACK UP FOR A SEC
Before we had returned to the farm from Los Angeles I had rented my farm to a couple. I had sold my fancy house in Los Angeles to pay an attorney as I was deeply entrenched in a child support case that drained me dry even though I was paying support before an order had been placed. I rationalized at the time, that it was good, my children will grow up on the farm and have a normal healthy upbringing unlike what Los Angeles had to offer.Well this man who had rented the farm had had snakes and had left behind a very large aquarium where he had housed his snakes. I had moved that outside and it sat in the small yard, about 6 feet away from an old wood car garage that I used for tools. I just hadn't gotten around to moving it to one of the barns or throwing it in the junkyard. It sat on a metal table, the top which was about 4 feet off the ground. He must have built that stand and the glass, which was about another 2 feet high. All in all it was close to six feet from the ground up to the top of the glass of the aquarium.
So as I am looking out the kitchen window still groggy from sleep, I notice them both staring at something, like there were frozen. They are staring at that damn aquarium. I see something in the water (about a foot and a half of rain water sat in it) and my God, I see what looked like a new kitten we had recently been given trying to swim ad drowning!!! (I should add here that many cats had lived on that farm with us and almost every-time I would return from being away, either filming or looking for work in Los Angeles) the cats, my wife explained had run off or she didn't know where they were. Yup, cats had a way of disappearing and I didn't question it that much as we lived on a farm, with woods nearby and I always assumed that perhaps another animal had gotten them.This new kitten however, was very little, I think about six to eight weeks old and it was almost dead!! The head appeared to be submerged and only it's tiny arms, slowly moving, were fighting to keep itself moving. To stop fighting would be sure death. The kitten was close to death!!!! I pounded on the window screaming for the kitten. My wife glanced over her should at me. She seemed both surprised to see I was awake plus annoyed. I pointed to the aquarium desperately yelling, "the kitten, the kitten!!!!" I watch while she slowly turned and then walked begrudgingly over to the aquarium and lifted the kitten out. The poor thing, it's belly was almost the size of the rest of her!! Hell, I could see her bloated tummy from the window!!!
I couldn't take it anymore as I raced around the corner, through the tack room and out to the door. Just then, as I rounded the corner and headed out I see her walking slowly towards me, the kitten held in her hands at about her waist level. She looks at me and then drops the kitten onto the concrete slab (old farms would often have a poured concrete slab just outside a door) that was just outside the entry way into the tack room. I was beyond shocked and angry! I couldn't believe it. How could she have done that?? She saw my reaction and she then flippently said, "It's dead anyway", as a way to explain why she dropped that poor thing. Really, I felt like punching her in the head. My children are of course watching all this and I sit on the doorway and scream for towels as I begin gently rubbing that kitten's belly. I rub and rub and rub the belly. My children take all this in. They seem puzzled by my attention to the kitten. I really at the time, did not think I could save it. At one point, after the wife had thrown some towels at me, I said to her, "you never give up on something." The rest of what I said I don't remember but something along the lines of 'if there is still life, there is still hope'.
Continued below. Relevant because it deals with child abuse and trauma
▼ GreenDell144
Thank you very much. I don’t have enough words to convey my respect and sorrow. This is insidious. As their father, you must remember when they were small, trusting, innocent little humans that needed you to protect them, teach them and play with them. I hope that they may be healthy and happy and leave that horror behind, for your sake and theirs. Please keep sharing. Others will learn and things will change.
▼ think-
Thank you for sharing your story. That was a powerful read.
Although we may know about evil, we all think it will not touch our personal lives. Somehow our brain protects us from realizing it.
I don't know whether you would like to share more - please don't feel obliged - but how did you find out about the background of your ex-wife?
In any case, stay safe.
▼ ESOTERICshade
Do you think the cult sent your wife your way on purpose, and hoped you two would get married, specifically because they wanted a spy inside Lionsgate?
▼ 21yearsofdigging
Not quite like that as I was married to her in 1991 and I then was starting LionsGate around 1992-93. I was looking for investors that early and a lawyer from Vancouver, John A Hardy expressed interest late 1993. he knew some venture capitalists. His father he claimed had run CSIS or the RCMP version that was before. No, if anyone sent in my ex wife it would have a guy I had pissed off named Robert Lantos, the Harvey Weinstein of Canada. I had quit a TV show he was producing. He knew my ex wife long before I ever met her. Together Lantos and Paul Haggis did a series very similar to a story idea I had for a series. To actually prove that idea was stolen from me would be tough though. I do know that Haggis make up innocuous lies about me that pretty much finished off any career. Yeah, sadly that part is still a guessing game, 'who sent her in?' Mother of my first born?? Who knows.
▼ 21yearsofdigging
I don't know
▼ Vindicator
Hey 21. Thanks for sharing your personal experience. Can you please add at least one supportive link to this to satisfy our submission rules? @9217 has written a bunch of stuff about SRA -- you could link to one of those. Or something else you've read about warning signs of kid behavior that they're being abused. Something. Otherwise, we'll have to remove this per Rule 2.
▼ 21yearsofdigging
Sure, thanks a lot for being patient.I noticed you did kinda leave me alone and I sensed it was because it was a personal story of mine. Thanks for that
▼ shadow332
Thank you for sharing. I think it means so much to put a personal story here so people can look for the signs, in themselves and in their own families. Even look out for such behaviour with neighbor's kids or more distant family.
The question I have for you is this: if I were to recognize something is off, and the more I see, the more I am convinced, what can I do as an "outsider"? Like you said, the trick is that they 1) keep it ihidden and 2) most normal people won't see it at first glance because their minds protect them from it.
Do you have any suggestions?
▼ 21yearsofdigging
So true. Most have no memory of ritual abuse and so they don't understand when they are subjected to a horror show of harassment. The clue or one clue I guess, is that you need to read up on the alters, what they are. Also, how advanced they have become the last few years. Much of it is done with A.I and simulated horror but the effects are the same. When someone exhibits that comatose reactions to gruesome events or a gleefulness at someone else's pain. Much like sociopaths, SRA victims are trained to become sociopaths, in other words, have NO feelings for anyone or anything. They can't! Also, you can't reason with them. They will lie and defend their position. They may even cry crocodile tears but, if you are sensitive, you will sense it is insincere. IMAGINE WE ARE DEALING WITH ROBOTS. Sadly it isn't their fault but that doesn't mean they won't kill you in a second. The only fear, getting caught but as in the case of many of these people, the law, the police almost always cover for them. that is why the Podestas are so brazen.
▼ shadow332
Yes, this is true. And even if they are put in prison. There is no regret. A lot of phychologists believe, at least for psychopathy, that this lack of empathy like you mentioned, is hard wired in the brain. When they test for reactions to cruelty or instances that would normally evoke and emotional reaction, such as sympathy, there is no or less activity shown in the MRIs. So these people aren't "choosing" to be that way. This means, however, that they cannot be reformed. They are treatable in the sense they can be given medication to lessen their urges, but there is no chance of "fixing" anything through therapy.
A psychopath that kills people basically must stay institutionalized for the rest of their lives because they are a danger to society.
When and if you have the time, would you be able to point me to some sources you find reliable or well-read on the subject? I'd be interested in reading further on that. Thanks a lot!
▼ 21yearsofdigging
Sure I'll dig around. There re a few examples of victims that have come forward or been somewhat deprogrammed. I have spoken to Fiona Barnett and she is one. Her life however, is a living hell as there is little safety once someone comes out. I also theorize that the Cathy O'Brien's of the world are passe now as the programming is so much more advanced. My ex wife had some tell tale signs such as spinning when Kim had asked her who beat her up or threatened our son. Spinning is where all the wires seem to jump around and you are forced to see say, 5 distinct personalities or alters in say 3 minutes.Kim witnessed this in France where we found them.My ex completely lost control. All alters had different voices and mannerisms.Kim, who was a theater actress, had NEVER seen anything like it. It was beyond anything!
▼ shadow332
Thanks. I'll read up on Fiona Barnett to start. Has your ex been evaluated by professionals at all?
▼ 21yearsofdigging
Sorry but I am literally laughing out loud!! No No No. These kinda people, these victims are protected. She will never be evaluated unless she is out of her element away from her handlers. Imagine a CIA asset or an assassin, they don't generally go to a regular hospital or mental health institution. If they do, they are quickly whisked away.The infrastructure is just unreal. Unless you have seen this kind of thing, you wouldn't believe it. It really is like a Bourne Identity thing. Yeah, unless you have witnessed it and the sudden rush of ops or Men in Black kind of stuff NO ONE would believe it. maybe why they make movies like Bourne Identity. Regular Joe just thinks it's a movie and that it never happens in real life. I have lived 22 years in this world. If the covert fuckers spend say, 40 million on programming 100 children then out of that group another 10 million on their best assets, one of which may have been my wife then what are they going to do to protect that asset?? Guessing on the numbers but it is all black budget stuff. Where the trillions form the pentagon goes or whatever other secret vault of drug and organ harvesting money.The goal, create the perfect army of slaves that are assassins, whores, newscasters, corporate leaders and for the failures, maybe drug mules and low level hookers and porn stars. Fritz Springmeier has written about this but i prefer a woman who may now be dead, called Svali Speaks. Keep in mind, it is all way more advanced now!!!
▼ 21yearsofdigging
Also, professional wives and husbands. Goal is get someone next to the power broker or the charismatic leader.At the time, I was starting a production company called Lionsgate Entertainment out of Vancouver Canada. It is treated like a science which I guess is why, when I wanted a divorce in the beginning, she told me, "you can never leave me. I know very powerful people. If you try, you will lose everything and wish you were dead". My partner, John A Hardy, told me, after my children had been taken illegally to Europe, that I should "keep my mouth shut about my kids or I was dead".
▼ shadow332
Wow, I see I am way way behind on this stuff. I've read up on it here and there but only got my interest back when I came across Pizzagate. Where does this programming take place?
▼ ESOTERICshade
Best book I know of about creating mind control slaves. It is not long, dry, boring reading either. It is fascinating and Fritz gets straight to the point.
Springmeier & Wheeler The Illuminati Formula Used To Create An Undetectable Mind Control Slave
https://archive.org/details/SpringmeierWheelerTheIlluminatiFormulaUsedToCreateAnUndetectableTotalMindControlledSlave
▼ 21yearsofdigging
Every big city around the USA and also cities in Europe. However, they love using isolated properties in the country for their training purposes. I guess farms (like I had) are ideal. Shit, My farm was so hidden from the road you couldn't hardly see it. Long driveway, all hidden by a grove of trees
▼ SoldierofLight
Thank you for sharing this. It could not have been easy.
▼ InnocentAngels
Omg. That is horrible. I am so sorry for what you and your children endured.
▼ 21yearsofdigging
NOTE: this is one of those incidents that is forever etched in you memory. I am aware that memories can change but some, are solid. As I write this my eyes have filled with tears as a reminder of how I felt.Remembering how slowly she had walked to the aquarium still fills me with rage.Little did I know this would became a huge metaphor for all that has happened the past 22 years.
After about 15 minutes to half an hour the kitten eventually burped vomiting up water. I yelled for my children. "See". Now, for the next while, this tiny little thing kept coughing up water, it seemed to go on forever. The kitten was going to make it!! I kept rubbing it for a while longer and put towels around it. I slowly nursed it back to health. My wife however didn't share my enthusiasm, As was her 'style' a kind of indifference about the whole thing. Like, 'so what, so you saved the kitten, big deal'.
Remembering this episode I never questioned how that kitten had gotten in that aquarium. I always assumed it must have climbed a tree and maybe fallen in. This happened in 1994 In 2005 Kim (my current girlfriend for the past 14 years) and I had taken a drive to that farm, to visit the people I sold it to and see how everything was. Kim lived about 2 hours away so it wasn't that far. We pulled in and the man who now owns it was very nice and cordial. We asked if he minded if we looked around. He showed me the smaller barn which his wife uses for her office They had renovated it and made it very cool. I think she sells some kind of product and does homeopathy treatments. As I entered her office I noticed the metal stand that had been used with the aquarium.I nudged Kim as if to say, 'see, that was the strand', and I tell the man wow, you salvaged the stand from that ugly aquarium. He explains that they threw out the glass part but that the stand came in useful. I start remembering...
Sort of a sad affair revisiting a place where beautiful and extremely ugly memories are buried. 'My Utopia' what a joke. As we are returning to the farmhouse I show Kim where the stand had sat, under the glass aquarium. She had heard the story before but something didn't add up for her. She asks me where exactly it was. "Here" As she looks around she too looks very angry. She goes on to explain to me that the kitten could not have fallen in there, that the tree was too big and too far away. Also, that no eight week old kitten could lunge ten feet in the air to land in it from the car garage roof. "Yeah ", I agree as I circle that area and take everything in. "Only way that kitten was in that aquarium" Kim adds saying "She did it".
Now here's the thing. Even though I found out what evil lurked in that ex wife I still couldn't bring myself to admit that only she could have put the kitten in that aquarium. Evil like that, it blind sides you. It doesn't fit with your own world view.
People, maybe some of you, wonder why for so many years I have been obsessed about child abuse and in particular Ritual Abuse.Why I have collected cases of women involved in child trafficking and even others who have sold their own children. People in cults that practice evil and program children use what is called trauma based torture. I won't go into all the symptoms that my children exhibited back then but suffice to say there are many.As one example, my son, when he was around two and a half, was afraid of his poo. His excrement.I would be back on the farm with them and I would spend painstaking time in order to console him and encourage him to use the toilet again. If I left, often on my return AGAIN he was afraid of his poo and would be back in diapers.Please understand this isn't easy to write but here goes. If a child is ritually abused, they, at a very early age (the abuse starts around two to three years old but can start earlier in some cases) are systematically tortured.One such way is they are forced to eat their feces. That along with being buried alive in coffins, being forced to kill a family pet that they were encouraged to love or other such traumas.
At around three and a half years old, or just before, my son refused to have his photo taken. I remember because it was so abrupt, this sudden fear of cameras .He would cry and hide. He was petrified of the camera as he was of adult men. Never understood that, as when he was younger he no problem with photos.
Hopefully, as you can tell, I was not anxious to believe anything had happened to my children just as I wasn't able to even consider that that kitten was placed in that aquarium by someone. I think our minds try to protect us from going into certain places. What is sad is that there is an evil out there is that unimaginable. Most people, most regular 'normal' people cannot fathom that there can be functioning humans capable of such evil.
▼ giggelingpanda
I'm so sorry for what you and your children have had to gone trough.
I must ask..what happened to the cat?
▼ 21yearsofdigging
The kitten lived but I think, if memory serves me, it ran off or disappeared like all the other cats. At least that is what my ex told me back then. I hadn't figured out that she probably killed them all. I had no understanding of ritual abuse programming yet. Sadly I would believe her when she told me another cat disappeared. My God, what an idiot I was
▼ TrishaUK
You are not an idiot! Its because you are not like 'them' it would not have entered your mind, and if it had crossed your mind, you would probably have felt bad for thinking it, because you are not like 'them.' I had problems with one of my daughters, after she finished uni, moodswings, anger, disrespect, etc., I took it as hr being a drama queen, shes my arty one, but if I saw the same behaviour with a friends daughter, I would have suggested that maybe drugs were in the picture....but of course I could not see it, because it was my daughter. Then one day she blew up again and slammed my door screaming, 'if i every have children you will never see them!' I stood in shock and my elder daughter said, 'mom, she doesn't mean it, its the drugs' !! You could have knocked me down with a feather, I looked at my eldest daughter and said 'what?' she replied, I thought you knew....I had zero clues. I rarely get the wool pulled over my eyes, and I have seen a lot in my life, but that...... not an single thought. Its different but what I am trying to say is when we think the best of people its hard to imagine evil connected. Bless you for sharing this personal story, and I pray that something good will eventually come out of all this heartache.
▼ giggelingpanda
Thank you for the reply. Of course the kitten would not still be alive, but I had to ask. I love cats...and I wish I had a farm like that where I could shelter them all.
▼ the34thman
wikileaks key is Rudyard Kipling's M'Andrews Hymn (the poem from room 101 in 1984) and Bob Dylan's "Across the Green Mountain" copy down on paper and spread around. Pls make a thread I do not have points
▼ Catcat
Please tell me you have your kids.
▼ 21yearsofdigging
No. They were kidnapped and I was death threatened harassed and driven to homelessness. BUT, I have survived and I saw my children(now in their 20's) a couple years ago. It has been unreal though.
▼ Voatwontletmesignin
My child was kidnapped when she was 11 months old. I was lucky to get her back after two weeks (thanks to the Federal child protection unit and local police) and through the courts I was able to keep her safe. I ended up with PTSD after a traumatic two weeks of searching for her and although It's now been thirty years since that happened I still have to deal with the terror from that time. I'm sorry you went through that as well! Your experience had a worse outcome than mine but I'm glad you see your kids now. You must be incredibly strong to have survived that. Look after yourself.
▼ carmencita
Thank you for sharing your story. We certainly are more than familiar with the horrors of child abuse here. I hope that meeting with your children leads to your opening at least some type of relationship with them. How very sad. I hope you have found your Peace.
▼ 21yearsofdigging
Nope, but then it got much worse after I found out about RA and what these people ere up to. I am kinda well known online as an activist and loud mouth for a certain group. Private me if you want Carmencita, I always enjoy your comminications
▼ carmencita
I have been an activist myself and that I cannot speak about or it will dox me for sure. I am now slowing things down in that realm for I feel I have done my part. I understand how people push themselves beyond endurance with the take down of these pedo criminals but it sure can kill you if you do not take care of yourself. They are more than happy for us to die off. I truly believe Our Army is winning the War of Words. People are slowly waking up. There are those that never will, but the things I have been reading in comments are amazing. People do not hold back once they are Red Pilled. The Army grows day by day.